By Michael Webb
Did you know that people who try to spice up their lovemaking, often make their experiences LESS fulfilling? It’s true.
Over the years, I’ve seen couples make the same mistakes over and over again, when trying to improve their love lives, and I’d like to teach you how to overcome and avoid these problems.
Here are the 7 lovemaking mistakes. Are you making them?
MISTAKE #1: Feeling scared or embarrassed to talk about trying new things
Have you ever had an idea to spice up your lovemaking but were afraid of what your partner may think?
Believe it or not, in 90% of cases, your partner would LOVE to try something new, too, but they’re just as uncomfortable or embarrassed about bringing it up as you are.
And you don’t need to introduce whips, chains or a third person. That’s nonsense! There are hundreds of ways to bring variety to your passionate play that aren’t crude or dangerous and that your partner is sure to be comfortable with.
MISTAKE #2: Trying to convince the partner to make love
If your lover is tired or not in the mood for sex, trying to convince or persuade them to have sex almost NEVER works.
On the other hand, when a person is sexually aroused, their body releases the chemical ‘adrenaline’ into the bloodstream. This chemical is what gives you the energy to make love. So here’s how to arouse them the right way. Yes, even if they’re tired.
Ladies: Want to get him in the mood? Give him fellatio or manually stroke him between 9 10 in the morning. This is when his testosterone levels are highest for the day. For better results, also wear something sexy or nothing at all. He’ll like that.
Lads: Deep passionate kisses are one of the biggest ‘turn-ons’ for women. Looking in her eyes and touching her face while kissing her can really increase arousal, too. And give some attention to her neckit will drive her wild. But don’t rush this! Spend quality time building up her arousal with your sensual kisses.
MISTAKE #3: Neglecting foreplay to enjoy intercourse sooner
People in a relationship (especially men) tend to neglect foreplay so they can begin to enjoy intercourse sooner, but did you know that foreplay is actually said to intensify orgasms?
That’s right. If you kiss, caress and touch longer, you can make your lovemaking even more satisfying.
So SLOW DOWN. Take your time. If you want to make it even better, tease your partner in a playful way. (This works like crazy.)
If you find something that they really enjoy, stop doing it, move back, and then do it again later.
The more you pull back and push forward, the more they’ll want it. And the more intense their experience will be. There are many games you can play to heighten this anticipation, too.
MISTAKE #4: Using toys or porn to make your lovemaking better
When sex hits a rough patch, many couples (men especially) think that a video, some plastic or vibrating thingy will instantly takes things through the roof.
Wrong!… While toys can certainly have their place in your lovemaking repertoire, relying on them can be extremely dangerous. These outside sources of pleasure can quickly make lovemaking even less fulfilling.
Why? Because you don’t want your partner to end up looking forward to their plastic toy for pleasure more than they look forward to pleasure with you, do you? Couples need to first fully discover how to please all their spouses’ body parts before introducing other elements. Use them as a spice, not the main course.
MISTAKE #5: Trying to make the woman orgasm ONLY from intercourse
Men often feel “unmanly” if they can’t satisfy their woman from intercourse. But what they need to understand is that a large number of women can’t achieve orgasm through normal lovemaking.
Just knowing this takes the pressure off men completely. Now there’s no need to get upset when their women don’t reach orgasm. Instead, men should master the art of cunnilingus (going down on a woman).
MISTAKE #6: Trying to “finish” at the same time
Simultaneous orgasms are quite overrated. Instead of aiming for one orgasm that you share together, focus completely on the woman’s needs first.
Hold off from the positions you find most enjoyable and instead make love in ways that are most pleasurable for your lady, until she is completely satisfied. That way you have a much greater chance of both climaxing.
MISTAKE #7: Sticking to a “set routine” too often
You know the drill. You take your clothes off, insert part A into part B, and, within a few minutes, the routine is over. Sound familiar?
No matter how fantastic lovemaking can be, there’s no denying it can get boring over the years. And the reason is because lovemaking in its basic act is always the same. But the danger is letting it get “too routine,” which can begin to affect your relationship.
The BEST WAY to protect your love life and precious connection with your partner is to have lots of new lovemaking ideas ready at your disposal.
That’s the secret.
In fact, when you have an abundance of NEW tips and techniques ready, you’ll enjoy more hot, steamy and passionate lovemaking, discover newfound enthusiasm to make love and even make love more often.
About the Author:
Oprah Love Expert Michael Webb is the author of 500 Lovemaking Tips, a book full of ways to spice up your lovemaking, adding more passion, pleasure and intimacy to your experience. To read more, visit this site.